Files and Bills and Killers, Oh My.

Files. Bills. More crap in the form of paper than I can barely comprehend. An all-consuming pyramid of impending doom that towers up to the ceiling and hangs in the den like a black cloud with that weird hovering eyeball. It’s Machu Picchu demanding a check or money order. A looming pile of excess, financial drudgery and societal reminders that’s enough to make someone load a machine gun and prop its tripod on the crux of a dormer and clean the trees of squirrels. Not me, of course. Someone else, in theory.

Now I almost understand Texas bell towers and southern university rampages. Eep. Better watch what I write because freedom of speech only goes so far. But if the FBI is reading this than I’m just about big-time.

Book deal, here I come.

Economic collapse and food riots may be in our future but the hope in all the doomsaying is that maybe then we’ll come together and make a car that runs and sells, or maybe we’ll realize that we should help each other from across the street instead of cutting each other off to get to the red light. Or maybe just a health care system that helps us all instead of bleeding us dry and turning our elderly and children into dope-dependant zombies.


It takes the demise of many for those left behind to realize the importance of community.

I had no idea the stack of mail were bills, requests for attention, red lettered warnings of payment due and growing late fees were for me specifically since I’ve changed my name to Reid of La Mancha. And the rest of the credit collectors and public utilities can go jump in a lake because I know that the only reason light and gas cost so much is because it’s funding country club memberships and summer homes for those presently more fortunate than I. Don’t blame the “economy” as to why budgets crunch and prices rise, we all know it’s because the lifestyle afforded to those who are regularly privileged is being threatened and we certainly can’t have that. Who’s going to watch the cheewawa while the disgusting little brat gets her nails done? Who’s going to trim the hedges or nanny the kids, who’s going to cover the Nordstrom bill or the fancy luncheons if we don’t jack up the rates and milk the people just a little bit more?


When the economy truly collapses, when there’s rampant looting and wheelbarrows full of American legal tender are pushed up to the butcher shop for a few flank steaks, when the beggars outnumber the commuters and jumpers from buildings are mundane occurrences, maybe then we’ll know something about “economic downturns”. Buck up, quit yer bitchin’ and be lucky you have a few dollars for a glass of whiskey on the way home.

This is all really just a message to myself. You might not have enough for a glass of anything for all I know. Then again you may be a grinning fat cat who uses whiskey to wash your whitewalls.


Better run, squirrel.


6 responses to “Files and Bills and Killers, Oh My.

  1. Whisky is for the dash and upholstery, Reid, it helps the interior smell good. I go pernod with a splash of chartreuse for the whitewalls – somehow they don’t turn green.

  2. Forget whiskey and white walls, the true goal should be to figure out how to squeeze nutritional value out of paper.

    Crazy you ask?

    Think about it…

    ….When the food riots begin, those of us who are struggling the most will be kings!

    Never look at that stack of bills the same again will you??

  3. More people are assaulted and murdered because of alcohol than all the street drugs combined.

  4. Alcohol is poetry. Violent, warm, destructive and beautiful. Homer said that alcohol was the solution to and the cause of all the world’s problems.

    As for Dr. John H’s ideas parallel on money and food, and the sustenance possibly found in it, makes me wonder. Despite the advanced thinking, isn’t there enough food on this planet to feed everyone? Where the hell is Michael Jackson?

  5. Have you watched the movie The Edge? The messege I took from it was when the chips are down, the people that keep their head are king. Doesn’t hurt to have some tiny knowledge as to what can and can’t kill you too. Many people seem to forget that their own hang ups are their worst enemy.

    True collapse and looting? Bring it. I saw soylant green. So what if it’s people! At least it’s food!

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