My Firstborn Is A Lab

Most good people love their kids. To the point that their kids are the best kids in the world bar none and they’re the cutest, brightest and obviously the one most likely to change the world with their incredible personality. We’ve all been at the receiving end of people telling adorable stories about their children and how their particular offspring is naturally superior to all other kids within sight.

Some people treat their kids like little monkey servants or they immediately adopt their own parents’ negligent or overbearing traits. Unwittingly or not, this is quite common, hence the cliche that we eventually all turn into our parents. We all hope we turn into just the good parts, though.

Whatever the case, there are few things as malleable as a developing child. You can literally turn a kid into any kind of adult you want, whether it’s a confident go-getter or a quiet reclusive intellectual. Or maybe you need someone to love you and depend on you, so you have some kids that validate your existence. Better yet, maybe having kids is a good way to have some leverage against your mate, a commodity for fighting and arguing. Yikes.

I don’t have kids but I’ve got a dog. As we all know four legged pets that don’t live in cages are the stepping stone in all relationships to having kids. Most couples who have dogs together are preparing for little ones or they’re deciding that’s as far as they want to go in terms of responsibility. Makes sense to me.

I want kids but to get them to wear little suits and fetch me things all day sounds like a lot of training and who has time for all that? Labradors seem like a decent alternative.

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